Death as an Advisor

As I have a tendency to do, today I got into another one of those strange conversations. Today’s conversation culminated in someone with a rather eclectic spiritualism, suggesting I use death as advisor in an attempt to discover what ‘possessed’ me - if the idea interested me enough. It did.

So despite Carlos Castaneda’s writings having always frustrated me, I decided a re-visitation was in order. So with the help of Curtainman, who pinpointed the specific chapter, I re-read and attempted to digest.

“Death is our eternal companion,” don Juan said with a most serious air. “It is always to our left, at an arm’s length. It was watching you…it whispered in your ear and you felt it’s chill…It has always been watching you.

Whenever you feel, as you always do, that everything is going wrong and you’re about to be annihilated, turn to your death and ask if that is so. Your death will tell you that you’re wrong; that nothing really matters outside its touch.Your death will tell you, ‘I haven’t touched you yet’.” ~ Carlos Castaneda Journey to Ixtlan

Initially, disappointment was the result as it had been many years since I'd considered death a foe, or something to be feared. On the contrary, for a while we had quite the relationship going and I not only considered it friend, but possible saviour.

However, after I'd pondered the problem for a while, it eventuated that I considered one other thing more important than death. Intensely private and personal, I now wonder if that is ‘the’ thing that possesses me. I think it highly likely, but even if it is, I now face the question - what do I do with this information?